Do you ever feel lonely? Ironically, you aren’t alone. They say there is an epidemic of loneliness that existed before the pandemic and was deepened by the isolation and distancing we did. Even now, three years out, loneliness fills many of us.
Three years ago, everything shut down. Even as we distanced and separated from each other physically, I felt drawn to connect.
We are meant to be in community. I wanted to create community at a time that felt like community was falling apart; I started a practice of going live on Sunday mornings. We just celebrated three years of Sacred Sunday meditation, three years of coming together to breathe, to connect to the heart, and to each other. That’s three years of clearing loneliness and connecting to love.
A Fresh Take on Loneliness
Before we clear loneliness, let’s look at it. We all feel lonely sometimes, and perhaps it is not all bad? David Whyte says, “Loneliness is a privilege. Human beings may have the ability to feel aloneness as no other creature can … Loneliness is the substrate and foundation of belonging, the gravitational field that draws us home and in the beautiful essence of its isolation, the hand reaching out for togetherness.”
Would we have connection and togetherness if not for loneliness? Would we recognize what we had?
Just as we released the dichotomy of good and bad and leaned into oneness, we can feel and acknowledge loneliness without feeling weighed down by it. We can allow loneliness to prompt us to reach out the hand.
Three Ways to Connect
We all long to connect. When we are lonely, it’s connection we seek. So how do we find that connection? David Whyte says, “loneliness is not a concept, it is the body constellating, attempting to become proximate and even join with other bodies, through physical touch.” Physical touch is one of the ways we connect and come together with each other. It’s one way that was particularly challenging during the time of shut down, distancing, and separation.
There are many ways to connect. We often try to connect through conversation. We share ideas. We express our feelings. We listen to other people. We find commonality.
The easiest and quickest way to rapport, to connection, is breath. Simply breathing together, connects us. That’s true whether we are in the room together or coming together from across the world through technology.
You Were Made to Belong
Loneliness often feels like a lack of belonging or a longing to belong. Humans were made to belong. We belong to each other. Let loneliness be an opportunity to remember that belonging is possible.
Reaching out can instantly heal loneliness. This reaching out could be open and clear — a note to a friend, a phone call. It could also be an inner gesture. Try this now. Breathe in love, gratitude, and happiness. These feelings/frequencies are the foundations of connection. Breathe them out from your heart into the world. When we inhale together and exhale together, we connect. We remember we belong